Maestra by L.S. Hilton

Well, this novel definitely falls into the I Don't Know What The Fuck I Just Read category. Maestra by L.S. Hilton gave me some very conflicting thoughts, not unlike the book itself; it's Fifty Shades of Grey without the whiny Anastasia, and Nancy Drew with extra naughty. And if there is one thing the book taught me, it's to never underestimate the underling.

Judith is a put-upon art house assistant whose talents are grossly overlooked and taken advantage of. When she accidentally discovers an impending heist, Judith sets off on a European tour that would make even the Hilton sisters green with envy (and scream from all of the spanking).

Maestra starts out interesting enough, though the uncovering of the heist is a bit confusing. It helps that Judith's work and her obvious display of intelligence are interspersed with erotic sex scenes with strangers who also happen to swim in the same circles, which is just the beginning of the various contradictions. 

Then Judith seems to put her Nancy Drew routine on hold while she high-end hooks from the French Riviera to Geneva. The book synopsis will have you believe that Judith sets out to reclaim what is rightfully her's when it's really more of something falling into her lap and she is just selfish enough to go after it. The story is empowering though degrading, overly complicated yet too easy, glamorous but trashy, and classy yet sleazy. The writing is pretentious and elitist even though Hilton has a proclivity for the word "cunt," and although Judith - as well as the book - scoffs at the idea that a woman embracing her sexuality is a result of trauma, she still peppers the story with snippets of Judith's violent childhood. Aside from that, we never get to know anything about Judith besides her fashion choices and how wet her pussy gets.

The writing - unlike the inside of Judith, apparently - is not smooth or fluid, and although Hilton obviously has a very broad vocabulary, it doesn't extend to her sex scenes. And what Judith makes look easy, Hilton over-complicates with her list of geographical places in lieu of any imagery.

Maestra is definite superficial erotic escapism in the way that is totally unreal and unbelievable. And even though Romance novels are always outside the realms of reality, I feel duped with this book for some reason; the execution just missed the mark. I won't rush out to the bookstore to continue the trilogy, but I won't turn it down if I happen across Domina at the Dollar Tree.

⭐⭐/goodreads CLICK HERE TO PURCHASE 

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Mercy House by Alena Dillon

A very lovely lady, who said she enjoyed my reviews 😁, messaged me to recommend Mercy House by Alena Dillon, a recently published read that I might have overlooked had it not been for this fellow book-minded individual, even though Amy Schumer praised it as, "...the book we've been waiting for." The story is intriguing and captivating, if not angering, though I wouldn't agree that this is the book we've been waiting for, so much as the book that has existed for thousands of years that we've done a stellar job of ignoring.

In an unassuming row house in Brooklyn, with a most unassuming angel doorknocker, is Mercy House. Run by Catholic nuns, the house offers a safe haven and rehabilitation to women escaping otherwise violent home-lives. In a twist of all-to-real irony, Mercy House, and those like it, are being investigated by the Catholic Church in order to make sure that their activities are in-line with Catholic doctrine, and the Bishop investigating Mercy House just happens to be a man with whom Evelyn - the head nun - shares a dark history. Both in a battle with her own anger and self-inflicted guilt, Evelyn and her ragtag team of nuns and House residents will work to save not only Mercy House, but themselves in this fast-paced, empowering novel that is sure to spark raw emotions and deep discussions.

Mercy House is a difficult story, both in the tales of violence as well as in the learning of it, and Dillon handles the complex issue of abuse with grace and aplomb. Her writing conveys the horrors within the Catholic walls without being overly traumatic in the telling, and she is able to stir just the right amount of emotion, which is ignited even further by her research. Though a fictional tale with fictional characters, Dillon draws upon several real stories, which is, ultimately, the heart-breaker.

I can't say I "enjoyed" this book because it tackles some very unfortunate subject matters, but Dillon tells a remarkable, important story. The only thing, really, that kept me from giving it five stars on Goodreads is that I feel there could have been a broader spectrum of ways in which a person - women - can be abused and victimized by others - men. There is a lot of what we're used to hearing about regarding the underbelly of the Catholic Church, but not really anything different, and, unfortunately, there is more than one way to skin a cat.

Though I am not Catholic - or religious by any measure of the word besides believing in God - Mercy House is surprisingly relatable. It is also very entertaining and empowering and not just to women, but to anyone who has been made to feel like their love and service to others is a sin.

⭐⭐⭐⭐/5 on goodreads. CLICK HERE TO BUY. $5.00 NEW CONDITION

The Chain by Adrian McKinty

Once again I caved to the social media frenzy and excitedly snatched up The Chain by Adrian McKinty from the library even though I swore I wouldn't check out any more books for a while so I could stay focused on my 300-deep to-be-read shelves. Let me just say, breaking my self-imposed rule, and the subsequent library late-fees, was...not worth it.

"Grips you tight, right from the start, and mercilessly refuses to let go. One wild ride," is my very first note on this book after I was undoubtedly sucked in by the first two chapters; that's what books are supposed to do, after all - get us hooked from the beginning. Unfortunately, The Chain grips you tight, doesn't let go, and drags you through a slow, character-driven plot that is more an attempt at a philosophical explanation of life than a propulsive thriller.

The Chain - believed to be hundreds of years old - is quite possibly the worst thing to happen to a parent. Their child is kidnapped and the only way to get them returned safely is for those parents to pay the ransom, kidnap another child, and be prepared to commit murder if anything goes wrong. The Chain studies their "participants" and Rachel Klein seems to fit the bill. Newly divorced, new job, and a cancer survivor, The Chain believes she's just strong enough to carry out their heinous demands, but just pliable enough to avoid going to the police, and to do whatever they say. The book jacket would have you believe that she is a strong-as-a-motha, mama Grizzly type who will stop at nothing to get her daughter, Kylie, back safely, while dismantling The Chain, which is, unfortunately, misleading. What is actually true is that McKinty's novel is slow, dramatic, and ultimately a poor attempt at existentialism where Rachel's "take down" of The Chain feels forced.

The premise - the very idea of the book - is enough to keep you reading, so where you would expect the book to be plot-driven, it mostly focuses on the characters and their basic emotional well-being during the time that Kylie is missing and after she is returned. The set-up for the major "twist" is unfortunate and weak, and in spite of the book being very wordy, the writing is choppy and comes off lazy; case in point, no one who isn't from Massachusetts and the surrounding area will care about the random list of street names. And the ending is an attempt at Dennis Lehane-esque waxing poetic that mostly misses the mark, like when my high school English teacher would call me out on my bullshit.

I will say, though, that The Chain is an eye-opening account of Social Media, the dark ways in which it is used that we hear about on the news but think it will never actually happen to us, and makes us re-examine if we're really being as social media safe as we should be. Posting our every move and thought is not only annoying, it's dangerous. So, more for the public service announcement than anything else, I give The Chain ⭐/5 on goodreads.